You Owe Me a Sandwich



I get it, I'm skinny. I'm trying to be less so, but it's actually a lot harder for me to do than you might think. I'm not going to attempt to numerate the hardships faced by skinny people or anything. The main hardship is chairs, as they are hard, and my ass is boney. That's not much to complain about.

There is, however, a certain type of jackass who feels the need to subject strangers to unoriginal attempts at body shaming, so I will say this:

If you, a stranger, are compelled to tell me that I "need to eat a sandwich", then you had better have a fucking sandwich for me. I'll be happy to oblige you by eating it right then and there. You can watch. Just don't pull this shit if you aren't prepared to provide the aforementioned sandwich.

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