Fuck You and Your Apocalypse Porn!

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Dear Unsealing Revelation, please go take your direct mail and go fuck yourselves. I am Samuel L. Jackson-level pissed off about your fucking apocalypse porn showing up in my mailbox. You people make me fucking SICK with your pants-wetting urgent desire to have an apocalypse. (OHPLEEEEZE, Lord - just come down and do a little smiting!!) It must really consume all your waking and sleeping hours, creatively dreaming of all the sinners that are going to die in such HORRIBLE ways while you get the express treatment up to heaven. You want it SOOO badly like a little bitch, don't you? Vindication for THE HEATHENS being able to lead free lives with the partner(s) of their choice, sleeping in on Sundays, and having the freedom to define what makes them happy? Well, I hope you choke on your bullshit. Or better yet, I hope you can learn to just be good folks who aren't obsessed with the rest of us roasting in hellfire. Seriously, piss off.

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