We’ve worked together for a long time and generally get along, but there is something so fucked about your personality that I had to write this: the whole “just kidding” thing.
See, you’re strong. You don’t take any. That’s great. But when you say rude, arrogant things that hurt other people, you’re “just kidding.” The funny thing is, you don’t notice you’re doing this. Example:
I’ve had you berate me before and rip me a new one. It was hurtful and uncalled for, but when I told you that suddenly you’re….. “JUST KIDDING!” I told you that you sure seemed serious, so you awkwardly avoided me for the rest of the day - kinda hard when we share a workspace, eh?
Keep being strong. Don’t take any. But for FUCK’S sake, if you’re going to say rude things, at least have the balls to stand by them. It’s ok to apologize. It’s not ok to decide you’re “just kidding” because you realized you’re being rude.