What Should I Do with My Life?

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I'm not sure. I don't even know what to do with my own life. Should I take it away from myself? I always wondered how it would feel like to slowly slip away from this world, to fall into the abyss- lost forever. I don't know how long I can keep going like this, living on when there is no point of doing so. It really is hard, and I feel horrible when I feel like killing myself over something this simple, because I know that some other people have it a lot worse than I do, but then it just makes me feel like a brat, and it just makes me feel worse. I feel like i'm slowly loosing my sanity, sinking into a pit of depression and I don't know how to save myself. I know that I have to save myself somehow, though, because nobody else will. I've had no friends in the first place. Ever. And I don't think ill have any friends to lean on for a long time. My parents wont hear anything I say, they don't care. Why would they? It's like I can feel my mental health just slipping away and I can imagine that it would feel so good just to let it all go in one swift motion, but I know that I cant do that, because my parents would be angry and I don't want them to be disappointed in me. I just want to release all of this somehow. Just please... I really want some advice, and I know that it's stupid to say something like this on here, where nobody's going to see it, or even find a way to contact me. It just feels good to let this all out where people can see it, but not identify me as... well, me.

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