THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 25 8:00 FOX SPIDER-MAN--Movie (2002) Tobey Maguire gets bitten by a radioactive spider and starts shooting white, stringy sticky stuff. "Eww" is right.
10:00 NBC THE SEINFELD STORY Interviews with cast members and clips remembering the most misanthropic sitcom ever.
FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 26 8:00 CMTV COWBOY U: MOLOKAI A reality show that teaches city slickers how to do manly cowboy stuffÉ like sticking your hand in a cow's vagina.
10:30 COM SOUTH PARK Things don't go quite as planned when Cartman directs Helen Keller: The Musical!
SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 27 8:00 NBC IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE--Movie (1946) Jimmy Stewart narrowly avoids suicide after watching the Nick & Jessica Christmas Special.
9:00 HIST HIGH HITLER How some of Hitler's decisions might have been made when he was high on goofballs.
SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 28 9:00 ABC DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES The gals of Wisteria Lane have a butterball freakout following Thanksgiving.
9:00 USA THE BOURNE IDENTITY--Movie (2002) Matt Damon pretends he isn't a big puss in this adaptation of the Robert Ludlum spy novel.
MONDAY, NOVEMBER 29 8:00 NBC FEAR FACTOR Best friends transfer live, blood-sucking leeches to each other mouth-to-mouth. HOT!
TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 30 8:00 FOX THE REBEL BILLIONAIRE The contestants fly to jolly old London where they're given a choice--sing or streak!
9:00 UPN VERONICA MARS Veronica decides to pass on the Kool-Aid when she infiltrates a high school cult.
WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 1 8:00 CBS RUDOLPH THE RED-NOSED REINDEER After being treated cruelly by Santa, a deformed reindeer and his gay dental assistant pal make their escape.
8:00 WB SMALLVILLE Lex accidentally poisons Smallville with a deadly toxin after experimenting with a bean burrito from 7-11.